Absurd But Elaborate Scientific Studies We Didn’t Ask For

We often assume that scientists spend their days researching and studying important things that will contribute to the development of our species. Though, it seems that they too are sometimes plagued by shower thoughts such as, “What if shrimp could walk on a treadmill?” Some scientists actually follow through with these questions, all in the name of science. And we’re about to share some of these shower thoughts turned into real life experiments with you today. Below are some of the most absurd but elaborate scientific studies that absolutely no one asked for.

1. How Do Shrimp Fare Walking on a Treadmill?

Someone decided to use up $682,5870 of taxpayer funding from the National Science Foundation to answer this question: “So what happens if we put shrimp on a treadmill?” Under the guise of studying the effects of stress on marine life, the researcher injected shrimp with bacteria then put them on a tiny underwater treadmill to observe their reactions. Unsurprisingly, the sicker shrimp performed more poorly than the healthier ones.

2. What’s the Mathematical Formula for Perfect Cheese on Toast?

Putting cheese on toast is one of the simplest and most straightforward things you can do. No techniques or calculations are needed. But there’s always one person who needs everything to be precise and perfect. That would be the Royal Society of Chemistry and the British Cheese Board who, after a long time, came up with a precise mathematical formula for the perfect amount of cheese on toast. Variables such as the temperature or texture of the cheese play a huge role in the outcome of your toast.

3. Are Apples and Oranges Really That Different?

For the longest time, we’ve been using apples and oranges as part of metaphor for things that cannot be compared. But for surgeon James E. Barone, something about that phrase didn’t sit right with him, so he decided to take a closer look. He may have been on to something because according to an elaborate paper he wrote on his discoveries, oranges and apples actually have more in common with each other than we realize. And that the only significant differences were their colors and seeds. Other than that, they’re pretty much twins!

4. How Does Sitting for a Long Time Affect a Cow’s Ability to Stand Up?

Cows are known for lazing around for long periods on any given time of the day. The Applied Animal Behavior Science conducted some studies to discover how cows’ ability to stand up are affected by prolonged periods of sitting. The research involved tens of thousands of instances of cows lying down with specially installed sensors. In the end, they reached the ground-breaking conclusion that the longer a cow sits, the more likely it is to stand back up. Revolutionary!

5. What’s The Deal with Navel Fluff?

Belly buttons are the daily reminders that we were once attached to our mothers via the umbilical cord. Other than that, they serve no clear purpose except to collect lint and dirt from our clothes and body. Most people don’t think much about the fluff—they just pluck it out and keep it moving. But for Georg Steinhauser, this wasn’t enough. He carefully studied 500 pieces of his own navel fluff in order to understand its contents. He concluded that the lint was actually directed by the type of hair found in the belly button and most of it came from the shirt he was wearing on each day.


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